


What Eve Hates

by MBrabs1996



Category: Underworld
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-29
Updated: 2012-07-03
Packaged: 2013-06-24 16:59:32
Rating: T
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,120
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8269646/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2220469/MBrabs1996
Summary: When David asks Eve what bothers her, he finds him self in an hour long rant. Please Review!





	1. What Eve Hates

**A/N: Hey guys! So, I got this idea while watching Jenna Marbles on YouTube, so as soon as Eve starts ranting and you're one of these people, stop reading this is meant to be funny, I don't wanna deal with flames!**

"So, Eve what do you hate?" David asked after they had watched a thousand movies due to being bored.

"Well, I hate bitches at the airport who walk through the security line decked out in every fucking kind of metal there is! I'm sorry, but, did you not know you were going on a plane today? Did you not think about the fact that you were going to have to go through security and a metal detector? When I go to the airport, i'm wearing jeans, a shirt, flip flops, and maybe a sweatshirt, you know? Sorry I didn't take the fucking time to put on every bracelet that I own, my belt, my prada sunglasses, I didn't put my earrings in, you just walk into the airport looking like a bitch or a slut if you're wearing shorts or skirts, hell, even dresses with your ass hanging out. Oh and David, you know when on the plane they have this video that says that when the inflatable raft slide thing comes out to please take off high heels cause they'll tear the raft? Um, if i'm on that plane and that happens, bitch run, oh and lets not forget the person who's asleep on your shoulder and snoring!Oh and then they're in an out fit that looks uncomfortable on a ten hour flight, I was on a flight like that, from here to France or Italy I can't remember!" Eve rants, David was almost afraid to ask:

"What else do you hate?"

"Oh, I also hate when i'm just walking in town and boys are fucking sagging their pants and i'm in school, eating or drinking blood, and a boys ass is hanging out, next time I see someone's pants sagging, I am going to pull their pants up!" David placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Are you done?" he asked, they looked at the clock to see Eve had been ranting for over an hour on what bothers her.

"Yeah i'm done" she said, just as Selene called her down to discuss important matters with her, Eve sighed and got up, David following behind her.

**A/N: Again, this was meant to be funny, so no offense if you're that type of person, this girl on YouTube talks about this shit and it's fucking hilarious, so i'm just helping spread the word on what she hates, what I hate, what everyone hates, etc, etc. Don't sue me! I don't own any of the stuff mentioned in her videos, i'm just too lazy to actually think about something creative cause it's midnight where I am, I lose all my creativity between the hours of 9 and 12 at night.**


	2. What Eve Hates Part 2

**A/N: So, I decided to make this a two-shot, because I can! And I have no life during the summer! So, any who, to the story!**

Eve walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table where her mother was sitting, it was awkwardly silent for a while.

"So, you wanted to see me mother?" Eve asked.

Selene sighed, "Eve, we need to talk"

The smile disappeared from Eve's face as she remembered every bad thing that she's done, from starting a fire in the woods that gave David very severe burns, to beating the shit out of a kid who offended her.

"Now, keep in mind this wasn't my idea, it's your fathers, and I am completely against it, but, you know how you were in Antigen for your whole life? Never allowed to leave?" The vampiress asked.

Eve nodded, "yes, of course, what are you trying to say?"

"Well, your father thinks you need to go to therapy, to help you with issues that were associated with Antigen, and a small part of me agrees that_" **(A/N: Therapy is going to be a separate story!)**

Eve cut her off, "I am NOT going to pour out all my feelings to some random person, and they can tell me 'oh it's okay to be upset honey' I mean, how am I going to explain that I was held captive as a test subject for my whole life?" The young hybrid asked.

"I have thought of that, to avoid being sent back, we are going to lie and say that you were kidnapped as a baby and you've been there ever since, Amelia will be going too". Selene explained **(A/N: Since I don't feel like explaining who Amelia is, just read my story Dark Labyrinth, it's better than me explaining who she is!) **

Eve sighed, "fine! But if I have to go, then you're going too! Besides you have issues too, I mean I haven't seen my whole family slaughtered before my eyes".

_She has a point_ Selene thought and nodded, Eve returned to her room to an awaiting David.

***Eve's room***

"So, what else do you hate Eve?" David asked, Eve thought about it for a minute.

"Oh, I hate when i'm getting changed or what ever and someone walks in on me! Um, the whole purpose of knocking is defeated! You knock BEFORE you enter, not knock AS you enter! And then they ask, "Hey Eve, are you changing?" um yes, I am changing for your information!" Eve ranted, and then gave a pointed look at David,

"Hey, I didn't know you were changing!" He exclaimed.

Eve scoffed, "the most embarrassing thing is, you kept on staring! At least when mum and daddy do it they have the decency to cover their eyes!" **(A/N: again, going to be another story! When I have time to right it) **

"Alright, i'm sorry, what else do you hate?"

"I hate when i'm walking home from school or i'm in the store and I see a guy sagging his pants, um, yeah, I don't appreciate seeing a guys fucking ass hanging out! Next guy I see with his pants around his ankles or what ever, I am going up to him and pulling his pants up for him!" She exclaimed, David nodded in agreement and left the room for her to get ready for bed in peace, not wanting to have a repeat about what happened while they were still searching for Michael.


End file.
